21 Memes Only PETTY Girls Will Understand

“Petty” isn’t a character trait, it’s a way of life. Sure, you could always choose to be the bigger person and let trivial matters go. You could choose to live and let live, or choose to stay in your lane and mind your own business … But where would be the fun in that?

Here are 21 memes that only the pettiest of girls (or guys) will understand:

 


 

21.) When your friends are trying to help you get over your pettiness, but you try and fail every time.

 

20.) At this point, you just have to accept that you were born this way.

 

19.) Or maybe you were raised that way. Either way, it’s a part of you who are.

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18.) You’re not too worried about your pettiness anyway, it turned out well for Blac Chyna.

 

 

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17.) When you check the weather and realize that every day is 100% chance of shade.

 

16.) When you have no time for baes who won’t respond to you in 5 seconds or less.

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The 18 Best Things About Having Guy Friends

The coveted, platonic relationship between a guy and a girl BFF is something most only see as legend.

Two people with potential sexual energy CANNOT POSSIBLY get along without wanting to jump each other. Am I right?

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The answer is no. Having a close guy friend has more benefits than any potential uncomfortableness that may be brought on by two close friends hanging out alone. Not to mention that most of the time, they’re more like a brother than any kind of potential hook-up, the prospect of which makes you actually want to vom.

threw up

 

The Ed Sheeran to your Taylor Swift, the Harry Potter to your Hermione Granger, you’re there for them through thick and thin, with the added bonus of giving insight to the often-confusing female perspective and none of the jealousy. They’re a great balance to have in a world surrounded by sometimes catty, passive aggressive female friends; here’s why:

18. Once you’re in the inner circle, guys will open up around you with their ridiculous, raunchy, crude humor… and it’s hilarious.

laughing

 

17. Their jackets are warm, more comfy, and essentially up for grabs at all times.

cozy

 

16. Their perspective is invaluable because they know how boys think in all situations. (As is yours when they’re wondering whether their GF is being crazy).

bitches be crazy

 

15. Boys have limited drama.

shenanigans

 

14. They’re a perfect cover when you’re trying to duck the creepy guy at the bar.

fake bf

 

13. They’re protective over you like you are their actual sisters.

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The 18 Stages of Having An Annoying Uber Driver

Some Uber drivers are the coolest, chillest people you will ever meet, but some Uber drivers are clearly the mayor of Creepsville. Some Uber drivers leave you wishing you had just stayed home and stared at the wall rather than get yourself into a situation where you needed to call some stranger to come drive you home. These are the 18 stages of having an annoying Uber driver:

 


 

(18.) It’s Saturday night, the feeling was right, and you did what you always end up doing— getting blackout drunk. 

 

(17.) You finally accept that you’re maybe not sober enough to drive yourself home, and you’ve seen enough Lifetime movies to know that trying to drive drunk never turns out well, so you turn to your last resort – Uber.

 

(16.) After the longest five minutes of your life, you finally get a text that your Uber driver has arrived.

 

(15.) The text says your Uber driver has arrived in a black car, but when you look around, there are like fifty black cars, so you try to discreetly peek into all the windows, looking for anyone who looks remotely Uber-driver-ish. 

 

(14.) Your uber driver will finally get tired of watching you stumble around like an idiot and roll his window down to let you know which car is his.

 

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The 17 Stages Of Getting Your Body “Summer Ready”

Every girl in the world has gone through the last minute panic when she realizes that summer is a month or two away, and she’s no closer to looking like a Victoria Secret model than she was last year. How are you ever going to wrack up the Instagram likes if your body is more “Fat Amy” than it is “Kendall Jenner”? Here are the 17 stages every girl goes through in an attempt to get her “summer body”:

 


17.) You accidentally open the Snapchat camera in Selfie-mode, catching a glimpse of your one-too-many double chins.

 

16.) With the summer season rapidly approaching, which means endless beach days and bikinis, you decide you should probably start working on your “summer body”. How hard could losing a few pounds possible be?

 

15.) You consider your options. Working out is something that people are, like, supposed to do, right? You should probably start jogging, or at least start taking the stairs? #BabySteps

 

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10 Things Every UCF Freshman Should Know

So you got into UCF? Congrats! These will be some of the best years of your life. But before you jump right in, here are some things you definitely need to know:

 

10.) Parking is literally hell.

UCF is one of the largest universities in the nation. We have about 60 thousand students currently enrolled. Unfortunately… the parking does not reflect that. If you’re a commuter, prepare to get to campus an hour early so that you can maybe make it to class on time.

 

9.) The squirrels are insane.

Almost every student has a UCF squirrel story. The squirrels are a strange mix of rabid and overly friendly, so most students just avoid them altogether.

 

8.) Don’t miss out on the school’s traditions.

Spirit Splash is one of the coolest traditions out of any college in the country. Almost every single person goes, so don’t be the one lame friend who slept through it. You’ll regret it for the rest of the year if you do.

 

7.) The shuttles take forever.

Just like the parking, if you want to have a shot at getting to your class on time, take the shuttles to campus at least an hour in advance. The shuttles are supposed to be on a strict schedule, but more often than not they come and go as they please.

 

6.) Get involved.

UCF is a big place. It’s easy to feel lost or lonely, especially if you’re new. The best way to make the big college a smaller world is to get involved with a club that interests you. Greek life, Republican or Democrats clubs, clubs for your major, or even clubs for people who love to take naps— whatever your interest is, there’s probably a club for it.

 

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Winter Struggles Only Florida Girls Understand

When girls think of “winter”, certain images may come to mind: Snowflakes, fuzzy jackets, and chocolate. When girls from Florida hear the term “winter”, what comes to mind is … well, completely different. Here are 10 winter struggles only Floridian girls can ever truly understand:


 

 

10. ) You were totally excited for like, the one week of cold weather for the year, mostly because you’ve been dying to wear a cute pair of boots. It’s not fair that girls in other states get to wear cute shoes, like, all the time.

 

9.) You feel insanely jealous of girls on Instagram taking super-cute pictures in the snow. Meanwhile, you’re drowning in sweat and have to pile on the deodorant.

 

8.) Christmas didn’t even feel like  Christmas, mostly because it was like 80 degrees out and instead of looking for reindeer, you were swatting away mosquitos.

 

7.) The super rare occasions when it does get cold, you have nothing to wear. It’s not like you need cute jackets or sweaters the rest of the year.

 

6.) While the rest of the world is freaking out over ‘Pumpkin Spice Latte’ and ‘Peppermint Latte’ season, you’re unable to join in on the fun unless the coffee is iced, which is totally not the same thing. Stupid hot Florida sun, thanks for ruining hot coffee for everyone.

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College Life As Told by 90s Cartoons

If you’re currently in college, there’s a pretty good chance you grew up watching these cartoons from the 90s and early 2000s. You might be surprised at how much these cartoons, originally meant for children, are totally relatable now in your late teens and early twenties. Here is your life in college, as told by the cartoons from your childhood:

You’re more broke than you ever thought possible, and even McDonald’s is occasionally a luxury you can’t afford.

 

Meanwhile, while you’re probably gonna be in debt for a good portion of your life, you’re paying so much tuition money you’re pretty sure your college is swimming in it.

 

You make bad choices, like putting off the test you should probably be studying for to go to Happy Hour instead.

 

And then you can’t even get any work done the next day because of your killer hangover, thanks to bottom shelf liquor and cheap shots.

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The Life of A Starbucks Addict

The life of a Starbucks addict is full of flavor and low on funding. You wake up craving those sweet, deliciously overpriced caffeinated beverages like they’re the elixir of life. $300 a month is fine to spend on coffee, right?

RIGHT?!

money

 

Here’s to you, Starbucks lovers, and all the things you know to be true in life.

 

15. When you notice money left on your Starbucks app and secretly thank past you for the best kind of present.

Kudzu

 

14. Or the internal celebration you throw when the new holiday specials are released.

Yum

 

13. …and obviously, you have to try all of them before ordering your favorite 100 times.

good

 

12. You know to always lick the whipped cream off the top of your Frappachino before sticking the straw in.

cat

 

11. And you gorge on cranberry bliss bars in the nonjudgmental sanctuary that is your driver’s seat.

cranberry

 

10. There’s also that one breakfast item that you love and probably order way too often.

breakfast

 

9. And the silent thanks you send to the coffee fates when the barista forgets to scan your coupon, so you get to use it twice.

I win

 

8. Speaking of coupons, can we just mention the FREE BIRTHDAY DRINK?

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Daily Thoughts That Do Not Make You a Bad Person

As a college student, I find myself thinking some pretty strange and pretty terrible things on a daily basis. Sometimes these thoughts become words, but most of the time I question my sanity for thinking them and move on. While they might be some bad thoughts, I am not a bad person, and thinking/saying these don’t automatically make you bad. There are somethings that happen that deserve some pretty bad thoughts.

Here’s a list of thoughts most people have daily that aren’t as bad as you think:

10) I hate everyone.

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You may just be having a bad day, you might hate like 3 people so it is just easier to generalize. Its totally okay to hate everyone.

9) Everyone just needs to STFU.

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Again you’re probably having a terrible day, and there’s that stupid group of people yelling in the library as loud as possible. While you’re not a bad person, you’re probably a hungover person. Make sure you stay hydrated while telling people to pipe down.

8) Stop talking to me.

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Along with STFU, its just one of those days, you just want to be left alone. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that. Don’t feel bad for keeping your head down, and quickly walking back to your room.

7) I would sacrifice you for a coffee. 

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That magic time of the morning before you had your coffee. You shouldn’t be expected to be nice, especially when someone is just down right too much. Its normal to want to sacrifice someone for coffee. You need the nectar of life, and are willing to do anything for it. Alright this one might just be me…

6) Can the proffessor just cancel class today?

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I get it, I paid a disgusting amount of money to attend class every day, but like, can’t he just take a day off? Really? Doesn’t he understand the need for me to lay in bed all day because I got too drunk last night?

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What Your Favorite Holiday Says About You

Arguably, there are eight major holidays that people tend to consider their favorites. This is what the world thinks when you say the following:

8. If Your Favorite Holiday is… New Years Eve:

You’re all about beginnings and potential as you are probably a really positive person. You take genuine delight from the magic New Years brings with the chance at starting over. You’re a list maker and goal-setter… and probably look fantastic in a sparkly dress.

new years

7. If Your Favorite Holiday is… Valentine’s Day

The only thing you love more than being in love is the idea of love itself. You burst with affection for everyone in your life, and you show it most on Valentines Day. Your favorite color is warm… pink, red, maybe even orange. You have an acquired taste for those little chalk-flavored hearts with cute sayings on them… and probably look fantastic in lipstick.

valentines

6. If Your Favorite Holiday is… St. Patrick’s Day

You like to get drunk… a lot. But that’s okay because what else do people do on St. Patrick’s Day (which you probably affectionately refer to as St. Patty’s)? You most likely have Irish in your bloodline, which makes the holiday that much more exciting because you can claim it for your own. And as for wardrobe? You wouldn’t be caught dead wearing anything but green on this holiday… head-to-toe.

Bonus: Definitely check out the St. Patty’s celebrations in Savannah and Chicago… there’s nothing like it.

st pattys

5. If Your Favorite Holiday is… Easter

If your favorite holiday is Easter, chances are, you’re incredibly family oriented… because Easter is typically a family holiday. You probably go to church fairly often and genuinely enjoy spending time with your extended relatives, who are all super close with each other. You love the fluffy marshmallow taste of peeps and finding easter eggs in the yard (even at this age). It is likely that your favorite season is spring and you look adorable in pastel… which comes in handy this time of year.

Easter

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Thoughts When Paying Dues

So, it’s that time again… chapter dues are posted.

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You’ve been dodging your Big’s ‘pay your sh*t’ texts all week and the last day has finally caught up to you.

mom

You look at your ‘payment due’ and lament the fact that you took the high road and offered to pay your own way through your sorority.

desk

You briefly wonder whether your pride is worth it… maybe you should just call Dad?

Dad

No. NO. You’re a strong, independent woman and you can DO THIS.

Beyonce

Carefully, you open the details of your transactions. You read the outlandish charges on your account and begin the inner war with your past self.

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DAMMIT T-SHIRTS! YOU GET ME EVERY TIME!

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I mean did I REALLY need all those date shirts? He wasn’t even that much fun.

Plus, he ended up acting like a drunken fool and I had help him walk. It was like aiding a baby giraffe.

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You swear to yourself that you will never purchase another date shirt again… though, even in this moment, you know it’s a lie.

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Which Holidays Are The Biggest Jerks

Now, don’t get me wrong… I love holidays. LOVE them. Any excuse to celebrate is good enough for me. That being said, the Christmas season is coming to an end; with all the holiday-skipping, there has been a fair amount of whining about which ones are being celebrated the right way. Feelings are getting hurt, memes are being made on behalf of turkeys, and holiday picketers are pointing fingers at Santa like he personally offended their mothers. We get it– some holidays are bullies.

So, we decided to list them in order.

8. New Year’s Eve

You know why New Years is great? There’s magic in the potential for new beginnings and every single person is willing to get behind that. It’s short, sparkly, full of excitement, champagne, and low stress. Everyone has the potential to wake up the next year, shake off the glitter, and move on with the aspiration to better themselves.

new years

7. Thanksgiving:

Thanksgiving is not a jerky holiday; Thanksgiving is the red-headed step child of holidays. Though it’s origins are questionable, the ideals behind Thanksgiving are solid… but everyone still skips over to celebrate Christmas for two months (because WHO doesn’t love listening to Jingle Bell Rock for a solid 55 days?!) Thanksgiving is usually celebrated for a total of 5 hours before switching back to 24/7 of the guy in the big red suit.

Thanksgiving

6. Easter

Easter is a religious holiday where everyone who normally doesn’t go to church suddenly decides to pay the pews a visit… And then the world just threw in a few unrelated associations. Colorful eggs with candy inside? Sure. Marshmallows in the shape of baby chickens? Absolutely. A giant trespassing bunny who breaks into your house while you’re sleeping to leave presents? Why not. Talk about unreal expectations.

Still, not as offensive as most holidays, so Easter has a pretty low jerk rating, as well.

easter

5. Halloween

Halloween is my favorite holiday… but let’s be real. It gives full approval for anyone to dress as anything in a mocking way. Some people take seriously offensive ideas and like to portray them with an IRL drunken night spent as another person.

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