Here’s the deal ladies: non-Greek boys will never be fully involved in Greek life. News flash – it’s because they aren’t Greek. Shocking right? No, not really. A non-Greek guy doesn’t party any less, have less networking ability, or a complete lack of social skills. They aren’t of another species or less relevant in college. So why do people keep making such harsh assumptions about them? They aren’t right, and here’s why.
5. He doesn’t understand why you call them sisters instead of friends.
The words are kind of interchangeable and saying sisters over friends is really just a way of distinguishing if they are Greek or not (not that it matters really, anyway). My boyfriend knows which friends are sisters because he listens. If I say I’m going out with my sisters, he knows who I’m referring to and how I know them. He also understands the difference in my relationship with them. Because, again, he listens. He makes an effort to understand that my experiences with my sisters and friends are different.
4. He’s super jealous of your favorite fraternity.
If my boyfriend is jealous of a fraternity or the brothers in it, he has yet to make that known to me. In fact, we go to different houses a lot and some of his best friends are brothers at my favorite house. He makes friends wherever we are, so jealousy has never been a factor. If he trusts you, he won’t be jealous.
3. He doesn’t know what comfort colors/spirit jersey/Lilly Pulitzer are.
This one is just ridiculous. I don’t know much about the clothes he likes, his favorite brand of boots, or why he loves his John Deere hat so much. But his preferred brands and clothing types are up to him. I don’t need to understand his shopping habits, so why would I expect him to understand mine?
2. He’s doesn’t have the “fraternity guy look” and needs help dressing himself for events.
If his appearance meant that much to you and you didn’t like it, you wouldn’t be dating him in the first place. Not all fraternity guys dress the same. In fact, I know very few who actually buy into the “bow ties and khakis” look. While some fit the stereotype, it is by no means the majority. It’s much more common to see a guy in a band/university shirt and jeans than in something that makes him look like a J. Crew wannabe. As for the weird notion that non-Greek guys don’t know how to get dressed up for formal, that is a complete lie. It doesn’t take a genius to figure out that pretty much anything by Adidas isn’t formal acceptable. If you want your non-Greek boyfriend to look a certain way, tell him. Nothing will change unless you communicate.
1. He doesn’t understand greek terms like big, grand big, twin, rho chi, PNM, GDI, etc.
This is one of those things that just comes with time. The way each girl going through rush has to learn the meanings of Greek lingo, a boyfriend will take time learning them too. If anything, he’ll remember them the more you use them. So if you want to talk about how lucky you are to have a twin and how awesome your big is, he will eventually understand the relation. If you explain what a GDI is and he conveniently forgets, it might be because he doesn’t care for the term. But honestly, who would remember something that sounds so derogatory to what they are? Some non-Greek boys may proudly say they are GDI while others just want to be unaffiliated with the title the way they choose to be unaffiliated with a Greek organization. It’s their choice – the way you made the choice to go Greek.
Dating a fraternity guy can be great and have its perks. But completely dismissing someone for their lack of letters could be the difference between having a date to every formal and sitting at home crying into a bowl of Ben & Jerry’s on Valentine’s Day. There’s really no way to know what someone is actually like until you talk to them. College is about getting to know people from all walks of life, so expand outside of the Greek community and meet someone who spends their time doing things that you’ve never done. I know there are going to be some girls who have dated non-Greek guys in the past and experienced some of the above issues. There’s a point in time, though, that you have to ask yourself if the relationship didn’t work because you don’t share an alphabet or because he just wasn’t the right guy.
Boyfriends That Are Misguided!