1. The Women
Expectation: A bunch of mean, terrifying girls force you to drink, dance, sing and pick them up from parties at 2 a.m.
Reality: You’re never forced to do anything worse than compliment your big sister’s crafting efforts. (The forced singing and dancing to One Direction comes after initiation–and let’s be honest, it’s not that forced.)
Expectation: You’ll be showered in all sorts of unpleasant substances.
Reality: You’re showered in gifts.
Expectation: You’re paying to have friends.
Reality: You’re paying for your friend’s 2 a.m. Taco Bell order.
Expectation: You are required to dress to the nines whenever you’re out in public.
Reality: You can’t remember the last time you didn’t wear yoga pants to class.
5. Mo’ Money
Expectation: You’re extremely wealthy. Daddy’s credit card pays for everything.
Reality: You’re shop at the dollar store more than anywhere else (with the expectation of Trader Joes, where you stock up on Two Buck Chuck and guacamole).
Expectation: You’re so good at making kitschy crafts, Martha Stewart and Zooey Deschanel call your ass up for help.
Reality: You have more glitter in your hair than on the heart-shaped frame you’re painting. Somebody just complimented you on your “sparkly earwig sculpture.”
7. Sexy Parties
Expectation: You party with super hot fraternity dudes every night, red cups filled with PBR held above all your heads.
Reality: You learn YouTube dances with your sisters while eating pizza Monday through Friday in your sweatpants (on Wednesdays, you wear pink).