Everyone has their own reasons for joining a sorority. Personally, I joined because in high school I had a lot of close friends and I was looking for that same feeling in college. And as everyone in a sorority can tell you, that is exactly what you get. However, you are going to have a different relationship with every one of your sisters. There will be your pledge sisters and your mentors but some of the closest people to you are those in your family line. You and your big will always have a special relationship. She has been there for you since the beginning and has seen you grow within the chapter. However, receiving a little is a whole new situation. This past semester, after all the stress, crafting and glitter, I was blessed enough to receive the most perfect little. She has changed my life in so many ways but here are ten of my favorite things about my amazing little.
10. She is a tiny version of me.
She and I are very different people but we are the same in every way that matters. Our emotions, sense of humor and values all align. She is the person I was when I was her age so I understand how to help in many ways. She always knows what I mean even though I don’t always express it. Most importantly, however, she and I understand each other because there is that similarity and bond that lies between us.
9. She compliments my personality.
Like I said, we are very similar in many ways and that is wonderful. However, it is just as important to have our differences work well with each other. I find myself staying in while she loves to go out. When I worry about the small things, she is there to tell me to calm down and when she is feeling sad, I am there to cheer her up. We work as a balance for each other.
So there is this guy. You met, instantly connected and started a whirlwind romance. However, as quickly and dramatically as it started, it ended. Maybe he cheated on you, maybe he cared more about his friends than you or maybe you two just grew apart. No matter the reason, you are left heartbroken and with many unanswered questions.
Let’s just start with this: You are not crazy and you are not alone. Whether he is an ex-boyfriend, a former fling or just a crush gone too far, we all have one. He is that guy that broke your heart but you still think about. He is the one person you hate but for some reason can’t stop missing.
The confusing part of this whole situation is that you don’t want him in your life. For whatever reason, things with the two of you went south and there is no way you would even consider going back. And yet every once in a while a song plays or a picture pops up that forces him back into your head and for a few minutes, your heart aches. You remember the good times, even if they don’t out way the bad. And as crazy, guilty, angry and sad you feel when this happens, I am here to tell you it is okay to feel however you do. And here is why.
You get to choose a lot in your life; what you wear on a date, what you eat for dinner and who you date but the one thing that is completely out of your control is your emotions. Whoever this person is that has stayed in your head holds some sort of place in your memories. Although, he has left your life, it sometimes takes a lot longer for him to leave your heart. He started as someone you liked, cared for and maybe even loved and that is the person you miss. But when you start to miss him, you must remember that at the end of the relationship neither of you were the same as when you started. You are now missing a person that doesn’t necessarily still exist.
To my biological non-greek sister,
Please understand that I did not join a sorority to hurt you but to help me. I know you do not always understand the decisions I make but I can never thank you enough for supporting me no matter what. However, as much as you try to hide it, I see the hurt you feel every time I call one of these new girls my sister and I need you to know that no matter what they will not replace you.
From a young age, you were the only one to understand me. You knew that I was mad from a simple stare and understood why I was crying before I had to explain. You always knew when to stand up for me with mom and dad. But you also knew when to tell me to grow up and how to teach me a lesson. You were never afraid to tell me why I was wrong and what I should do to be better. However, for the most part, I was always thankful for it.
I share something special with each and every one of these girls but it is completely different than the relationship I have with you. My sorority sisters know me as I am. They know how confident and outgoing I am. They see me take on leadership roles and act fearlessly. But you know me as I have always been. You have seen me go through my awkward nerdy phase and stuck by me through bad hair cuts and questionable style choices. You have been with me through all of my firsts and a few unfortunate ends. You know that I am self-conscious and scared of disappointing everyone. You understand what gives me joy and breaks my heart. You have watched me become the person I am today. But most importantly you have shaped who I am.
You were my first friend and the person who I have shared my life with. You will always be home to me. But when I came to college I needed to find a second home to survive. Leaving behind someone who means as much to me as you do was not easy. I didn’t join a sorority to leave you, my sister, behind, I joined because you mean so much to me that I couldn’t. I needed people like you at school to help me through and that is what joining a sorority gave me.
I will love you for ever and anyone else that enters our lives will never change that.