5. Philanthropy events. We spend hours upon hours planning these and collecting materials for a hamster ball soccer game or a firefighter obstacle course or a pageant to raise money for charity. We make team shirts, posters, order food, and take cute pictures. How did the act of giving back get so complicated?
4. Rallying. OK, I might have threw up that last shot… and the pizza I ate for dinner. So what? That’s more room for more shots! I ain’t going home! My body isn’t trying to stop me from pouring poison down my throat voluntarily!
3. Waking up early to pregame, skipping the football to nap and then going to the post game. Well we have to sleep sometime and it certainly won’t be when I’m drinking…go team!
2. Being on Adderall…like all the time. Studying or partying, it comes in handy.
1. Spending $30 on a discoball for your apartment but refusing to buy a textbook that’s essential to passing the class. The only reason you have that apartment is because you’re away at school…while your parents pay thousands of dollars for you to be a student… and hopefully pass classes…